Tuesday, 6 January 2009

RIP Wendy

My supervisor died yesterday, very suddenly. She collapsed at work; was rushed to hospital; but died about three hours later of an aneurysm.

I didn't know her well, so I don't feel any grief for her, which I feel a little bad about. But I hope she... I don't know, I hope she wasn't in pain, I hope she didn't know she was dying. I hope she enjoyed her job, I hope her last days were good and her last thoughts (before collapsing) were happy or at least not unhappy thoughts.

I know very little about aneurysms, but from the reading I've done on them today, it sounds like you can't see them coming, which is a scary thought.

I guess it's a reminder to live each day — not as if it were your last — but to live each day, enjoy each day, appreciate the small things, because you really don't know whether it might be your last. Wendy was fine in the morning, dead by the evening.

I'm not particularly perturbed by Wendy's death, and I feel like I should be. But most people didn't seem too sad, and I guess that's another thing — when I'm gone, I'd like to be missed.

But I'm sad for Wendy that she's gone now, and I'm sad for those who loved her. It's hard to think positive thoughts about death when you don't believe in an afterlife or in God or anything, when you don't think a dead person can "rest in peace" because they simply don't exist any more.

But I hope her last thoughts were happy ones. I hope her last day wasn't too stressful. I hope she did appreciate the good in her life.